"Waterboarded by my own kid": Dad-joker Martin Henchion dishes the dirt on parenting

Kinderling News & Features

Family life can be equal parts mess and masterpiece. Comedian and radio-presenter, Martin Henchion takes the messy parts of family life and turns them into hilarious tales for people everywhere.

From tongue-in-cheek anecdotes of accidental waterboarding from his daughter, to the romanticising and reminiscing over that glorious time pre-children, when you could actually find things in your own house.

A guest on The Parent Panel, Martin takes us through the five things modern fatherhood has taught him. Like a love of bike-riding and how nice it is to just sit in silence.

1. What is your favourite thing about being a dad?

It's the little things, the little humorous surprises. Like when I woke up one morning when Hazel was one year old, and she was pouring a glass of water into my mouth. While she was technically in breach of the Geneva Convention, vis-a-vis waterboarding, it was quite hilarious.

2. What’s your favourite thing to do with your kids?

Singing songs and making up parodies is a big family past-time. My favourite time for this is on road trips. There are no distractions and everyone has a turn. For one-on-one time, my favourite thing to do is hop on the electric bike and cruise around the Illawarra. We have an excellent bike path that runs along the coast, where there's parks and cafes aplenty. We get on the bike, and I oblige all of their requests. And we sing.

3. What is the thing you miss most about life before you became a dad?

Sleeping, golfing, having a proper conversation, spontaneity, cooking in peace, cooking, silence, being able to find things around the house.

4. What has been the biggest surprise for you about being a parent?

The biggest surprise for me was my new-found ability to sit in silence for indefinite periods. I now enjoy almost any activity that I can do alone. 

5. What does 'me time' look like for you?

Cutting the lawn, cycling to and from work, walking. Really, there's not much 'me time'. Occasionally, my wife will take the kids to visit family for a few days. I sit in blissful silence.

Hear Martin and other favourite Aussie parents on The Parent Panel. Listen in Apple Podcasts and listen in the Kinderling app!